When is enough, enough?

Sarah • 3 pregnancy loses. 4 failed IUIs, IVF with 1 failed frozen transfer and finally have our healthy boy!! Momma of a 3 year old, angel twins 10/19, and successful fresh IVF is giving us boy two in November!
Hi ladies! This is my second month on Clomid, 100mg. My husband and I have been trying for about 3 years now. Though I believe I wasn't ovulating until Clomid so I don't know if we can physically call it 3 years,  but mentally it has been 3 years. Well, I think I'm about to get my period due to the spotting and cramping I'm having so I assume I am out for yet another month. My husband doesn't get it... He said I need to calm down and stop worrying about this process but as you ladies on Clomid know, it's not that easy. I told him that I think I might do one more round and be done. I don't know how much longer I can't take the side effects, the emotions, the let downs.. Not to mention, this month I got a yeast infection and my dr said its either pregnancy or the Clomid and could happen again. When is it fair to say that my body and mind have been through enough?  Easy for him as he is involved in the fun stuff while TTC but I am the one who gets the hot flashes, fatigue, lack of sleep, change in appetite, sore boobs and absolutely crazy emotions from the hormones. When is it fair for me to decide that I don't want to be put through this anymore? And why can't my husband understand this and everything I go through? 
Sorry for the long post. Maybe I just need to rant but I am beyond upset and I'm so sick of feeling this way over and over and over again. Maybe it's time to just decide that I will never be a mother? 
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COMMENT (3)

An

Posted at
I reached the same point. I finally said enough. TTC was killing me, making me depressed and bitter. That's not what it should be like. I'm trusting God but no longer trying. I'm focusing on my health and my marriage and next year we're going to start fostering!! There are so many beautiful kids waiting to be adopted! 

Sa

Posted at
I completely understand and my husband doesn't get it and tells me to relax which is hard to not be a crazy hormonal person on clomid. I would honestly take a break. If this cycle doesn't work I told myself that I was going to take one because I'm just so tired physically and emotionally.

Lo

Posted at
I'm so sorry, I totally understand, I haven't been trying for quite as long just two years but it's a heartache every month, I am on my third round of clomid at 50mg and my period is due any day and I fight the same thoughts of just wanting to give up because it hurts too much to be disappointed. Gl in whatever you decide.💜