How do I become happy again?

I feel like I have been so sad for so long. I don't have any close friends and it kills me to see pictures of my old friends going out and having fun. Me and my boyfriend are very close but I'm always concerned that he could leave me and I'd have nobody. I live in a small town and I know everyone and everyone has their friends. I'm very bad at making friends because I'm REALLY awkward haha so I just kinda have nobody..I'm constantly sad I just want to escape my life