Praying for a Christmas Miracle🌈

My heart feels Soo heavy right now and I'm beyond depressed.. I'm suppose to be 9weeks pregnant but as of last Friday I was told at my Ultrasound they couldn't find my loves heartbeat and to expect a misscarrage.. They said it must have stopped around 8w2d I was hysterical and crying all weekend.. I ended up going to the ER for some reassurance on Saturday..that Maby Just MABY they were wrong.. The results were the same and hit me twice as hard.. Now I have my 3rd and final ultrasound on Christmas eve, I'm praying for a miracle and to hear a heart beat..This will be my 2nd miscarriage within 3-4months.. I just had one in mid September at 5-6weeks then on my Birthday in November I found out I was pregnant!I was Soo happy and full of joy!❤ I can't bear to go through this again.. I just keep going over the unthinkable options they told me to decide on before my appointment.. I'm so worried I don't feel nauseous anymore nor are my boobs sore.. I was told Thats what happens when your baby's heart spontaneously stops💔.. Its been almost 5days and Im not bleeding or cramping or anything that would suggest a misscarrage getting ready to happen.. I feel so alone and sad.. Thank God for my mother she's been helping me with my daughter ALOT. My SO works all day so beside seeing him at night I'm alone through out the day with my brother's teenage girlfriend Thats 6months pregnant and rather annoying and insensitive.. I Really don't knw what to do or how to stay positive.. I just don't understand.. My daughter was born 2months early and I had severee Preeclampsia that causes a placental Abruction.. That was three years ago and since then I was on Implanon the whole time which was removed in August.. Is this happening BECAUSE of my history?? Is there something wrong with my body? I can't help blame myself.. I'm so lost.. PLEASE keep me and my little love in your prayers and send all the Baby Dust possible to help that little heart Beat💕💕