Okay this will be very long but I will try to skip into the details. Okay I met my ex in 8th grade. But we never talked to each other but I thought he was cute but then after that year I moved schools then once I went to high school I had a class with him we finally got to talk. But in that class he sat the right side of me like 2 seats up and my friend at the time sat next to me and she was trying to get his attention she would flirt with him and well it kinda got me jealous but back then I was way strong and didn't care but when she would always call him and when he turned then he would always look at me and smile or like one time we were doing Bell work and I saw him randomly turn I saw in the corner of my eye that he just looked at me. But anyways after that term ended we didn't really see each other but we would text. But at the time we were talking he was talking to my other friend at the time not the one that was trying to get at him. But we were growing a thing together but he was also talking to her at one point he cut me off I was very hurt because I was falling head over heels for him bad. The girl she was talking to moved so that might be a reason he started to talk to me again But then we started back up again in 11th grade we both told each other that we liked each other very much we hung out a few times & well again he randomly stopped talking to me I was hurt once again & he was talking to another girl which was a year older then us and I didn't talk to him for like 4 months or so But my dumb ass begged him to tell me what went wrong between us. He said he didn't like me blah blah. But then through out that time I was sad but never showed it. & once again after Christmas we started talking he said he only liked me as a friend and some other stuff happend but I can't remember what. But then 12th grade came and we had our ups and downs he for once wasn't talking to another girl. But that was the year I lost my virginity to him. We were both virgins and I believe he was too cause he's pretty shy and he didn't know where my hole was but that's another story. But we did it and once prom  came around it was girls choice and I asked him and we went but I was very happy with him but before that or after I got asked out by him. And what I need help on is what should I do now that we are out of school graduated and to be honest we were still fucking even though we aren't together. Last time we did it was 2 days ago but that day was totally unplanned we both agreed if we hung out again we would do what friends do. But no we bought food sat in his car listening to music and talking and one thing led to another and as I knew it he was inside me without a condom 😬. But when we were just talking after or before idk but when all that happend I asked him how he felt for me he looked at me and said that he dose like me allot but he just isn't ready for a serious relationship just yet I mean I guess I understand he's 18 and I'm 19 but honestly I told him age doesn't matter as long both actually mean allot to them the relationship will last. But I'm just so used to him texting me I would talk to him 24/7. Crazy how once we broke up back in February we always found a way back to each other and I just wished he was ready to be in a relationship. So I just need help on what to do I still like him very much but I'm also completely done waiting it's been like 3 years wasted on him.