Letting go and saying goodbye

I just changed my staus on Glow to "Avoiding Pregnancy" and I am heartbroken. My husband and I have been married for going on 9 years. We have a 5 year old whom we both love and adore but unfortunately has some health issues. I have wanted to have another child for years but the potential age gap between the two children was starting to make me uncomfortable. I had talked with my husband here and there about trying and he always shrugged it off as a "later discussion" but I finally sat him down and laid everything thing out. We had always been on the same page and he had promised me that we would have another, one day. Well he retracted his promise. He decided that with our daughters health among other things we are not going to plan on any more children. I know I have to let this go and move on for the sake of my family. It's just very hard to say goodbye to my baby to be. I was very much looking forward to meeting you, little one. I wanted you in my life. Even though you will never be, I will always love the very thought of you. As of now... I am so sad and I am mourning the loss of the little munchkin that I will not get to the chance to mother. But soon I will move on and I have my husband and my daughter to care for and enjoy for the rest of our lives. I am still blessed in many ways. I just need to focus on that and not get caught up in what I don't have.