I don't know what to do

My husband and I have been trying for a year now. I have done testing, Clomid, opks, and pre seed in hopes it will all work. I got another bfn this morning and am heartbroken. Idk what to do to stop the heartache. It's so hard to be around my family, the people I work with, and even go to church seeing everyone so happy with their children, talking about us hopefully getting pregnant soon, ect. I have so much faith that Heavenly Father is watching out for us and know that we are always going through trials of faith but I sometimes have the awful thought of if he loves me why would he let me go through so much pain? I feel like a terrible person saying that. I don't know how to make all these feelings go away 😢

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