Just having a really hard time today, and wanted to vent to ladies that get it....

Sunday at church I just found out that the Pastors DIL is expecting her 3rd baby, due the same week my lost baby was due (last week in July). That was very hard to hear (and still smile while we were all congratulating her). It was unexpected and felt like a punch in the stomach.

I have a 3.5 year old who we did not tell about the pregnancy/loss, but a week after the loss he started asking for a sibling. He knows that God grows babies in mommies tummies, so I explained to him that he could ask God to put a baby in mommies tummy. Since then (God bless his sweet faith), he seems to talk like it's not if, but WHEN he gets a sibling (specifically a sister these days lol)...

Over the weekend hubs and I were organising in the attic and let him sit up there and watch us. Today out of nowhere, he looked up at me and said, "hey, when i have a baby sister she can have my crib from the attic!!!! And we can set it up in the red room!!!" (currently a craft room)...I'm currenting getting AF (2nd since the mc, and it's unusually short cycle again at 25 days...an even shorter cycle than my first one after the mc)...and the level of certainty and the sweetness and the excitement in my babys face...broke me. And I had to leave the room to cry for a few minutes.

Just struggling to be positive today <3