Why won't she leave him?

Question

My best friend has been with her cheating bf for 3 years, and she found out he was cheating like 2 1/2 years ago. 😔 I hate him, I wish everything bad on him for what he does to her. I don't know why she can't let him go. But I don't harass her about it, I still listen to her when she's sad and needs to talk. Everyone tells me to stop being her friend because she's being stupid. But I would never do that, most we've done is not talk for a couple of months because we argued. She's been my best friend since high school and I would love nothing more than for her to fall in love with a great man, but he just won't leave her alone and she keeps letting him stay. He has ANOTHER girlfriend, they got a house together! And my friend knows about it. Nothing I can do though, I've said all I had to say about it to her. Me and her use to be roommates and I almost fought him. I've never fought anyone! Let alone a huge ass guy, but that's how much anger he brings up in me. She's had to go to therapy because of him because she was so depressed and be on medication. He actually made her be on anti depressants. He is a horrible horrible human being and if I could get away with murder I swear on everything I would kill him with my bare hands. There is a huge list of all the crap he's put her through, but I'm getting angry just typing this. Why won't she leave? She's told me countless times how much she hates him. She texts me stories about what he's done to her lately, and she'll tell me how sad and miserable she is.
I don't know what to do. My boyfriend gets so mad at me for being her friend, he doesn't even let me mention her. But I can't just walk away from her like that. I hate seeing her this way. When we hang out she's happy, for those few hours she's back to the girl that I've always known. For the women who have been though this, or are going through this. Am I wrong to still be here for her? Should I just give up like everyone tells me? I can't make her leave him obviously.

Answer

It's her life hate to say. She needs to fall on her butt then you can be there maybe to pick up the pieces. Sorry if harsh.

Answer

Don't wish bad things on him. He's not the problem. If your friend was truly unhappy, she'd leave. Maybe she enjoys the drama and the attention she gets from the drama. No offense but your friend sounds like an idiot. And I wouldn't feel sorry for her after he cheated the second time.

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."

Answer

Your doing what's right. Your an amazing friend. All you can do is be there for her cause when she does finally leave him she willreally need someone to lean on. Just think if it was you you wouldn't want your friends turning their back on you.

Answer

You need to be there to support her, unfortunately she's just going to have to learn the hard way. Give it time and she will leave him but until then keep being a great friend and being there to chat to if she needs it

Answer

Don't stop being her friend because one day if she does decide to leave him, she will need you

Answer

your friend need a psychologist.

Answer

You know, I stayed with a guy who beat me up almost daily for 5 years, physically, mentally, verbally abusive and I was convinced he loved me.... I don't even know to this day why I stayed in such a bad situation for so long.... He eventually left me, and I realized soon after he was gone how dumb I had been, and how much happier I could be without him.....

She doesn't know why she stays, she cares about him and even though she shouldn't she loves him.... O can't even give you an answer to this day.... I don't know why I put up with my ex's shit for as long as I did.... So she probably doesn't know either.

Answer

Some ppl like being victims. They will complain endlessly, but never do anything to change the situation. I understand your frustration bcs your friend sounds like one of those ppl. On the other hand, she also exhibits signs of emotional abuse. I've been there. It's horrible. Took me 3 years to get away. I was very grateful to the friends who stuck around.

Why won't she leave him?

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