All the what ifs
So I've been having a very hard time lately with think about all the would have been with my two babies. They both had trisomy 4 and wouldn't have survived anyway so I know it's a blessing in disguise but I'm ready to be a mother. I don't want to bother my SO with this because I feel like I talk about it to much anyways. My best friend is pregnant and I would have been due with the baby from my first miscarriage right after her.
I feel like a horrible friend because even though we talk a lot I don't really want to hang out with her. Why did my babies have to be taken? What did I do that was so wrong? I just have a lot of guilt even though I know the fault came from my SO sperm, I still feel like it's my fault. Anyone else feel this way even after it's been a couple of months?
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