How can I break up with him??

Question

I think I need to break up with my boyfriend. We're 21 months in and I love him, but he is not giving me what I deserve in a relationship. For one, he cannot tell me he loves me. He's never been able to say it. And secondly, he puts me secondary to his parents and family and I feel second class and unimportant in his life. If I am supposed to join in marriage with a man, shouldn't it be someone who loves me and puts my opinion first above his parents'?

So I think I need to break up with him. Continuing to be with him, without him being able to say I love you, and with these issues, makes me feel so insecure. The thing is that I love him. I love when we're together, I love our jokes, our conversations, our thoughts and ideas and how he treats me in general. And in every other way shape and form, he is absolutely the perfect man for me, in every other regard he has blown my expectations of a partner out of the water and just amazed me that someone that amazing could exist. But him not being able to say " I love you" has just gotten to a point where I'm wondering if we're meant to be.

I know he doesn't want to break up at all, but I think I need to. But how do I? How can I when the reason I'm breaking up with him is because I love him more than he loves me? How do you break up with someone you love and thought you would marry?

Answer

Maybe talk to him and explain everything the way you did to us-- and see where the conversation goes. I've been in relationships where the affection isn't balanced and that's rough and can only work for so long before it implodes. However, telling him everything about how you feel is a good first step that isn't too dramatic.

Answer

Try reading the Five Love Languages. Maybe he's saying he loves you in a way you don't respond well to...

Answer

There is nothing wrong with family first.

And think about this.. you say he is amazing and perfect.. isn't it better to have a man that shows he loves you than a man that says the words "I love you" but doesn't show it.

People say those words too easily nowadays, it's their actions that mean more.

Answer

I totally understand but maybe I love you are just words and has no meaning unless it's shown and maybe when it's shown then the need to say I love you isn't important anymore 😳😊good luck sweetie

Answer

I think this deserves a conversation before you take actions. Just because he does not say he loves you, doesn't mean that he doesn't! He can show you with actions which are far more reliable than words.

Also nothing is wrong with family first, he should put his family first, they are the ones who brought him into this world and raised him and will always be there. Family first, love life/friends second, nothing is wrong with those priorities.

Answer

And if you don't know how to break up with him shows that you should not maybe take a weekend apart have a girls weekend or take some time for yourself maybe go to the movies or get a good book and distant yourself from him for a few days and see how you feel after that

Answer

Some guys just don't like to show they have feelings I tell my dad I love him and sometimes won't say it back or when he says it he is not looking at me and this is my dad.... He likes to show that he is a wall and won't crumble... And with his parents there is a time when you should be first and that is when you are is family as in his wife and he better put you first as of now just put yours first

Answer

In my opinion he's a man.  Maybe he can't say I love you directly.  Maybe he's saying it in others ways.  Ands I don't agree with your thinking his patents should come after you.  I would be so mad if my husband of he didn't take care of his mother before me. He is 1 of 6 children she raised alone.  I can take care of myself.  If my mother in law needed something anyone of of her children or in laws would be there.

How can I break up with him??

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