Well first off you'll need a bit of back story:

A few months ago my bf sold his house. He owed the deposit back to his parents and they needed it, so when it sold he gave them theirs back plus what he owed them for when they've helped him out over the last 10 years.

He went to stay with them for a week and blew 10k on casinos! They're in another country they booked his flight mostly to make sure he did the bank transfer.

He came home and told me. It wasn't my house or my money so could only laugh at him for being an idiot and angry because we'd made plans together.. but anyway

That was November, when he got back he was in debt he'd gone 1000 overdrawn on his bank so had his wages paid into my account and I used both wages to pay bills sort his debt buy food etc. He didn't like not having any control over it but also due to a not so old drug habit of his i dont trust him with money but he wanted his freedom back and opened himself a new account in January.

His wages went into his account but I was still dealing with everything and he's been refusing for the last few weeks/month to help me out or to pay his share.. Inc a 60 phone bill on the landline!!! All calls made while I've been out which came off my direct debit. So naturally I've been angry with him for not paying it back, as well as not making any contribution to the house. Helping me carry shopping home from the supermarket and being there when I've paid for it. Loading up the cart with his stuff and making no effort to pay for it himself or to help out.

Last night he told me something to do with his health that affects me, but he's known about it and kept it to himself for a week! So I now need to take time off work to go get checked out. I've been off all week he tells me last night. I was at the drs on Wednesday .. He tells me last night!!

I've been so angry with him for not telling me sooner but also the money thing is really bugging me. We share a lot of our electronics both our Facebook accounts are signed in on everything and a message pops up from his mum. Hes expecting news about his gran so i opened it. He's been telling her since the drs argument that I'm kicking him out I've called him a dirty junkie scumbag (true) hes nowhere to go and no money. So I've read it and thought I haven't told him to go, he's leaving. He told her what he owes me and tells her he's barely got a 5th of it. So I woke him up and asked him where's it all gone.

He's gambled it! he has less than a days wage to live on for the rest of the month. Oh my days!?! So I did kick him out at 3am. I don't care he's not going to take the complete piss out of me

So today I've calmed down and he came back for his things. I said to him were not going to work out if this is what he's planning on doing. I said that as long as he's battling addictions whether it be drugs or gambling the only way our relationship and even friendship can work is if he let's me deal with it again. I mean at least we didn't starve but to be honest this month and next we'll be lucky to survive. He kept saying he'd pay me back when we got home but never did and it's mounted up. He's now on his own with next to nothing but says no, he can't give up that control and live on my handouts. So now I'm fuming again he's been living on my handouts for the majority of our relationship and more in the last month to the point it's come to this.

We've been in a relationship and living together for 5 years he got the drug habit the last time I trusted him with money. Sept 2014-december2015 He gets tested every fortnight and has been clean again since before christmas.

Am I wrong for asking him to let me take care of everything again? How do I get him to understand?

Comments welcome and thanks for any advice you have

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Chantelle: no I'm not never have been. Kinda wish I was I'd have known about the drugs months before I found out and I wouldn't be in this situation now either. Also his actions don't just affect me I have a child to think of too.

In other news he's told me today that he flattened his car tyres to stop himself from driving since he cancelled his road tax and insurance to get the money back, and lost that too - idiot