Wednesday I went to my 11 week 5 day appointment expecting to see my LJ for the first time and it's been a world wind ever since. Instead of seeing my baby the doctor informs me I have fibroids and was unable to find the baby. She scheduled me to have a u/s next week and blood work to check my hcg levels done the following day. I had been spotting for a week so I was very concerned at this point. Friday night I started having mild cramps down the center of my belly. .. She told me I would have pain associated with the fibroids but I felt this was different. Early Saturday morning I went to the bathroom and passed two blood clots. I immediately went to the ER and a u/s was performed and confirmed my worst fears. I was in the process of having a miscarriage and the sac was measured at 7 weeks instead of 11. The doctor actually said the u/s tech could see it moving down slowly so he knew it would happen sometime that day. I was devastated. I decided to go home and go the natural route after talking to the nurse that was on duty who had been through 4 mc herself. I was expecting the pain to be like my period cramps (my first pregnancy was a breeze bc my cramps are like contractions every month I was used to the pain) but this was far worse, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I am blessed to have an 11 and 8 year old but I still feel this huge emptiness for the child I never had a chance to see. This was my loves first child and although he's been here for me I know he's really hurting. Sooo much has happened in a span of 72 hours it's beyond exhausting. It's so crazy how one day you have a child and the next day your body is darn near back to normal and all you are left with are the memories you created in preparation for the child that will never be...... I'm so heartbroken.