Hi guys. I'm 19.2 weeks prego, we found out a couple months ago there are some abnormalities with the baby however they're unable to pinpoint the cause. We do an anatomy scan on the 7th to look at all the structures and then probably off too a larger city for more testing. In the mean time we wait. I also have a 18mo daughter who is great but has reached the terrible two's early!

During this same time I'm dealing with my seriously ill father who is forcing me to be the bad guy as he's not completely competent. Looking into nursing home placement cuz I'm tapped out. I have nothing left to give. I also have some health issues of my own!

I am so emotionally drained even sitting here getting a pedicure I'm crying. I think it's just because it's quiet and no one is talking to me. Quiet time to think. Think about all the things I've messed up, things I should have done or not done. Worrying about the baby, blaming myself. I just can't get a break. I know worrying is bad for the baby but what can I do when my relaxation time is taken up by crying?!? I'm seriously concerned about post partum depression after baby comes!