How to distance yourself from in laws without causing turmoil?

Ok so my In laws are great people and have helped us out money wise a lot and I am very grateful for that but they also have a personality I am not use to. They think mean offensive jokes are funny about one another and I constantly felt like I was competing for my mother in laws attention against my sister in law, so I backed off and let them become really close, and now my mother in law barely speaks to me. My brother in law also has no kids and has a lot of extra money so can buy them big presents, so they will say stuff like "jake is our favourite son because he bought us tickets to this." I am over sensitive and I know this and tried my best to deal with comments they make but lately I have started crying there and feel embarrassed but they have gotten a lot meaner lately. When we went out there the other day no one said hi to me and I just sat there by myself because no one would give me the time of day. I want to start letting my husband and kids go out there more often and stay at home but I don't want it to be a huge deal. Not everyone gets along with in laws and I am done with drama when I go so what do I do?