My sister just sent me this and I was rolling. Thought some of you much want a laugh.

"I was in college and on antibiotics, which were wreaking havoc on my digestive system. After a party I ended up at my crush's dorm room. I kept everything above the waist, for fear of losing control over my intestinal muscles. He suggested I sleep over, which I unwisely agreed to. Once I was sure he was asleep, I very carefully parted my butt cheeks to release the most silent fart possible, but liquid hell came out. I could feel my skirt and underwear barely holding the mess. He woke up, blissfully unaware of what just happened two inches from his, um, package. I needed to escape, so in my poop-induced panic I gave him a hand job as a distraction and then left. I walked home with liquid shit running down my legs. Ended up dating the guy for three years."