I feel awful about my body

ca
Hey guys, so I liked feel really awful about my body type. I have a lot of muscle, I'm a long distance runner and I use to be a soccer player. I'm just not in the stage of my life right now where I need to be muscular anymore. I want to look more feminine, I want to look better in a bikini:( I have some fat too, but I also have a lot of muscle so it's difficult to tell them apart sometimes LOL. I have 2 options I think, drastically reduce my calorie intake and stop working out so much, or loose about 15 pounds very slowly by cutting back calories A LITTLE and continuing to work out everyday. I want to wear pretty dresses again and feel more pretty I guess?:( I feel horrible about myself. Does anyone have any tips or advice?