Sex drive doesn't match up


I'm trying to figure out how to talk to my husband without him feeling like I'm being pushy...but our sex drives don't match up at all, and I really need more sex between us. We have sex maybe 1 time a month (sometimes longer stretch), and if really prefer a minimum of 2-3 times a week.

I've tried bringing it up before and he gets all defensive. I understand it's a touchy topic, but it's a part of our relationship that is really lacking. I don't feel as connected as I wish we were becsuse of the lack of sex. I don't feel sexually fulfilled, and I try to take care of myself a lot (it just isn't the same).

I just feel like when we have sex on times a month and I'm taking care of myself my masterbating at least 15 times a month just to try to get by there is a problem. I know his workplace is stressful. I also know that alcohol can make he desire sex less. I've tried to express the importance of our sex life making me feel desire and making me feel like we are more connected, but nothing has changed.

I'm just trying to figure out a way to express my needs without hurting his pride. Has anybody else has this issue? How did you handle this differance? Did you find/recommend how to make a compromise with this differance?