Eating disorders

So when I was in high school I was almost 200lbs. Living at my dads was terrible, all him and his girlfriend bought was junk and frozen pizzas. Towards junior year I developed bulimia and anorexia, where in less than 6months I was down to 160lbs. I was also working out like crazy. Once I hit 160lbs I couldn't lose anymore weight but I couldn't stop my eating disorders. Finally by the time I graduated I had a lot of family support and support from my best friend, life got better and I loved in with my mom. I was able to stop the eating disorders and it's been two years now. But I can't stomach more than a light snack during lunch and then just dinner. I'm also now 187lbs and very unhappy and it seems almost impossible to lose weight. It's so tempting to just stop eating all together again but I'm staying strong. But the reason I'm posting is because I'm wondering if anyone else on here has gone through eating disorders and if so and you have recovered is it harder for you to lose weight now too? I just feel so ashamed and my stretch marks are back and it feels impossible to lose the weight I've gained back!