Panic attack (long post)

Everything was perfect, we had dinner, we brought the cake, eat a lo and there was also some alcohol. Beers, vodka, and others. It was the perfect night, everyone was having a great time until the end. 

When we were about to leave, my bf's cousin threw up near the toilet, on a wood floor. And I freaked out. At first I was so mad at him, but then I panicked. That's my parents place, is where my family works, I asked for permission and was my responsibility to keep it clean and perfect. Also, my parents are very strict about alcohol, I was never drunk and of course never went beyond my limit.

It all started when I realized that all the responsibility was on my, even if it wasn't my fault. I started hyperventilating, lost focus of sight, I could hear my fast heart beat, my legs were shaking and wouldn't react. My thoughts were a mess and couldn't stop crying. Luckily my boyfriend was there, hugging me and calling me. He had to shout to me to make me react, because I was kind of out of this world, in my own negative train of bad thoughts. He took care of the whole situation with help of his friends, while also caring about me. He was so gentle with me, because he knows how strict my parents are, and made sure that everything was clean and with no smell.

I'm so touched because he was so caring, responsible and filled me with kisses the whole time. 🌺 I know I can trust him completely. ❤️