Hard time

I've been coping with the fact I have to go in and terminate my pregnancy on the 12th but today just seems really hard I know it's getting closer and I don't want to do it but I know what I'm doing is best for the baby so she won't be in pain I know it's going to be hard but I know I have to get through this because I have 3 other kids that need my love and support have a wonderful husband and a mom also a cousin and Aunt that are helping me through this I just I want to lay down and wake up from this nightmare I love my daughter with all my heart I know she will be in heaven just asking for more prayers to help me get through this really hard time thank you for all the support you guys have given me