I've been with my amazing boyfriend for a couple months now. He's 18 and I'm 15. He lost his virginity to me. He loves me so much it's crazy. 

Last month I was beginning to think I was pregnant. I took a few HPTs. The digital came back with a ? And the pink dye had an almost invisible second line. I was extremely worried because my period was 8 days late. But I got it the next day so I stopped worrying. 

I got on the pill that next week because I was so scared of that happening again. I've been taking my pill, everything's been fine. Execrpt my symptoms were like 20x worse than what the doctors said. I was bitchy and nauseous and my boobs grew like 2 cup sizes in a week, I was cramping all the time. It was all the symptoms they described except WAYWAY more severe. 

Last week I started to notice I was kind of bloated. Which wasn't a symptom they mentioned but I just assumed that's what it was. One day before I started my placebo, I noticed my boobs weren't as big and I was cramping like CRAZY. I started my placebos a few days ago. and my period didn't start til 2 days ago. Or at least, what would be considered a period. All that morning I had sharp stabbing pains in my back, abdomen, and vagina. I went to go change my pad after noticing my flow got suddenly heavy. I looked down. And there it was. A pink, white, and bloody mass about 1/4 the size of my palm in my pad. I thought it was a clot at first. But then I picked it up and realized...blood clots don't have their own bloodline...the mass had capillaries. It was a baby. 

I started screaming and crying and I flushed it down the toilet as fast as I could. I called my boyfriend immediately. And he came over within 2 hours with jack in the box and cookies and he held me the rest of the night and comforted me.

I'm so lucky to have such a supportive boyfriend..but I still can't process the fact hat I was even pregnant. And I lost that baby. I wouldn't have wanted to abort it. But it's what's best..God's will I guess. I have no ladies to talk to..I just need some girl support. I should've taken care of it and myself better..😔