Pooping after tearing

I'm a week postpartum and have been taking stool softeners, but even though my poop is soft, it hurts so bad to poop. It's to the point that I've been eating less because I hate going. It hurts my butt and it feels like I'm ripping my stitches too. Then it takes forever to clean up afterward. It seriously takes me like 20 minutes because it seems like however much I wipe, I can't get it all. And afterward, I end up having to lay down because of the pain. Anyone else dealing with this? If you've been in this position before, how long did it take to get back to normal?