So tired of not sleeping that I'm just fed up and angry/pure frustrated to be honest. This baby is literally killing me. I mean not literally but... I know it's not his fault. I'm just so fucking tired of being tired ALL the time. I'm just so tired.  I should have gotten my tubes tied.  If I would have known my fiancé was going to basically just let me raise the child and do everything on my own every single night time then I would have gotten my tubes tied.  I've been through this before with my first born and was alone though... I thought it would be different because I was with someone and we would do it all together but man was I wrong. It's more like he holds the baby here and there when he wants to and that's about it. I'm doing this shit all over again alone and I'm remembering what I went through the first time. I'd never regret having my child but I'm just tired of doing it all. And extremely tired of being tired. Yesterday he watched the baby so I could catc h up on a tiny bit of sleep. I told him just give me a couple hours and it was mid day. 45 minutes later he woke me up.    Just fed up. And hate that I went through with everything.  I thought my days of feeling like a struggling single mother were over. I'd have support and help. But I sit here every single night in frustration and anger.  Suffering through every hour of lost sleep alone.   I'm sorry I just had to vent.