Has anyone here found themselves so exhausted of disappointment that instead of symptom watching they are convincing themselves that nothing is a symptom?

Yesterday I had these funny pains in my boob I automatically said must be because I'm laying wrong. My back pain is extreme I decided that's because I need to take a pain killer. This morning I wake up so thirsty but feeling weird I drank a few swallows of cold water and a minute or two later start throwing up. Thought maybe it's the water on an empty stomach threw up juice then not long after what looks like clear idk what so I try to eat a slice of bread I can taste the starch so I started crying nope that's because I didn't eat enough yesterday and white bread is nasty. I refuse to think anything is more than just my body being mean to me. .I'm tired of making everything into hope..is this just me?