So let me begin: I have one child from a previous relationship and always wanted more, just not like this. I had a really terrible time with my ex who was very emotionally abusive, and ended up sinking my life savings on court to get him out of my life. After the years of abuse and losing practically everything except my son through court, I was quite set on the idea of never having children with another partner, only as an SMC with a donor. I was planning on starting TTC after I've finished my present studies in about a year. Enter the boyfriend, he's perfectly nice but has not long come out of a terrible marriage. I was taking the pill but mucked it up and now am pregnant, I feel terrible and it's all my fault, it wasn't supposed to happen like this. He does not want me to continue the pregnancy but respects that it's my decision. He's not a bad person but he's not in a good headspace and he's simply not coping. I don't know if I want to continue with the pregnancy but I'm really scared of having an abortion. If you've had one could you share your experience and help me feel better about the procedure if that's what I choose?