I'm sixteen, turning seventeen in December. I started dating my ex-boyfriend in September of 2014 and he broke up with me in March. To make a long, LOOOOONG story short, for most of our relationship, he raped me. Multiple times. Sometimes when I was asleep. Sometimes when I was awake. Sometimes he tied me up. Sometimes he pinned me down. Sometimes I was just too scared to move. Sometimes I ran away and he caught me. (Never once with protection, by the way, I was scared I was pregnant every other week because he just didn't care.) But I still love him. For some reason. He broke up with me because he said I cheated on him, which just wasn't true. He said that I scarred him (I had to go to the hospital because he literally tore my vagina but I SCARRED him. Huh.) He says he wants to stay friends (and has also made it clear he wants me for casual sex, but screw that, I can't trust him within a mile of me) and that he's just not into the prospect of another relationship. We've been talking, and the conversations have been relatively pleasant, but the memories of what he did to me haunt me every day, to the point where I'm going to try and see a counselor about possibly having complex PTSD. So, in sum, should I drop him or is the friendship worth pursuing?

UPDATE: I'm getting a bit better at letting go. I still talk to him occasionally, (yes I know, stupid) but I'm finally being able to change the way my room is arranged and decorated (He helped me with both when we first moved here) and even forced myself to throw away an old piece of junk we made together that we had only kept for the sentimental value. I'm talking to this really nice guy and I think he may like me. Who knows. I hope I can one day heal from this. My counselor is going to see about whether or not she actually has to report it if it's between two minors and not actually going on because I really don't want to press charges, I just want peace.