Stoned thoughts...

Life is bothering me so much lately. Every one sucks. Everything hurts. I'm so cold and it's like I have no more love in me. There's not one person who I think I could stay the night with for more than one night without getting totally annoyed with them, including the recent guy I started seeing. There is one guy who I would love to be with all the time, but of course he wants nothing to do with me so he fucking sucks too. I just don't like other people and it's driving me insane. I can't let loose and be "happy" all the time like everyone wants me to be... Because I'm just not like that. Never have been. I'm a realist I see people for how they are I see this world as a bunch of people with great qualities but their bad qualities always out weighs them all it's like I just want to wake up from this pissy reality. I want there to be a build-a-man workshop and just make the perfect dude-- but even then! I honeslty would probably still have a problem with him. This world just isn't making me happy no matter what I try to do. No where to turn. No more hope.