I have absolutely no clue on what to do!! I just got back in the house from work and my mom is pissed and beyond at me. I'll try to explain the best I can. So for the past two months I've been working in this warehouse job and I have the overnight shift. I'd leave to go to work at 5:30pm and come back in at 4a. Yes a ten hour shift. Well I started dating this guy back in March but we've spoke since January. I feel as if I'm in love with him. We go almost everywhere together and talk all the time. Also I'm 20 years old soon to be 21 in December, my boyfriend turned 22 in April. I live in a house with a strict Caribbean mother and a twelve year old sister.(just to give a bit more background for clarity). I've recently been in touch with my sexual energy and I just lost my virginity a few days ago. Thursday to be exact. But what I usually do is sometimes my job sends us home early if we want to go home early that is, and usually I would because I have another job so I have lots of paychecks coming in. But I wouldn't go home, I would go over my boyfriend's house and we'd cuddle and sleep and get freaky at times.(he is a college student here for the summer living with his mom). Well a couple of weeks ago we "tried". As I am, was, a virgin with a very tight hole. And Thursday I decided to lose my virginity one night in his mom's house. I was happy about my decision and I didn't really bleed because we had tried a week prior and I bled slightly but we stopped immediately after that. I wanted to wait until marriage but after a while I became more proud of my sexual feelings and that desire to wait lessened and lessened. The decision to have sex that night were purely mines. And I always said that I wouldn't mind it being with my current boyfriend because he makes me feel so comfortable with my body. I also bought a vibrator a few weeks ago because, why the hell not. Growing up in a strict Caribbean family, not to mention religious, I always felt that sex was bad. Even now at twenty, I always watch porn when my mom isn't home and I can't begin to imagine what her reaction would be. In addition to the already long story my boyfriend and I planned to go to the beach yesterday (Sunday) but I came on my cycle Saturday but since I wasn't a virgin anymore I bought a box of tampons(because in my household, you don't wear a tampon unless your aren't a virgin). I got the box Saturday night because that's when I had started my period.( I had left work because it came early). The box of tampons stayed with him. So basically I'm now getting in the house, and idk how she found out, but she is speculating about me not being a virgin, she knows about the tampon, she saw the vibrator, and she's questioning my period and the events of Saturday( I quit my job because the management sucks and I had to wait 20 minutes for assistance on a bloody underwear. I called my boyfriend just to let him know I quit and he suggests that I come over there and wash up or something and not drive 30 minutes home bloody, I went to the store to buy wipes and underwear and cleaned up at his house put on his pants and stayed to eat and chill for a bit.) she thinks that didn't happened. And she claims she has had enough and up to here with the lying and deceit. I know am wrong for lying and not coming home after I got off early to basically have sexy time with boyfriend. I don't feel bad about the vibrator though. I have been lying to her. Also she is basically "cursing me" and telling me that it'll all come back to me and she feels deceived by my boyfriend and I. I don't know who will actually read this until the end and care enough to respond but I don't know what to do. She's kicked me out before and then two months later wanted me to come back, I wasn't ready, but so she won't be mad I did(I had stayed by my dad which they are currently going through a divorce). I don't think I can stand living here any longer but I don't know what move to make next. I can't trust nor turn to anyone. Please someone help me.