So I went for a scan just over a week ago t be told baby is measuring to small and would need to return in a week for another scan to check for growth ... So there I am at the second scan and you know it's not good when they go quiet and say nothing :/ she says sorry there is no growth but please wait here for me I red to get some one so all divinity out of window laying there sow mine else joins looks they nod and she goes . The original lady says get dressed we will chat and then she says again how baby isn't groaning and there isn't a heartbeat so I feel like I have just been shot in the chest with emotions thinking I can do this this is the bed news hitting me for her to then say I think your having a molar pregnancy I will need a doctor to come see you please wait here .... Now I'm confused what even is a molar pregnancy ?!?!?!? He agrees he feels the same next all I hear is surgery anaesthetic ASAP must be done this week do you want cremation or burial for your baby and tumour ! So molar pregnancy is when 2 sperm go into the egg instead of one and nope this isn't how twins are made as I found out I felt so dumb ! The placenta then grows way to fast and I the shape of a bunch of grapes too with loads of fluid filled cysts the baby also would have had 69 chromosomes in stead of 46 so wouldn't ever of survived but the placenta also takes away all room eventually if molar pregnancy isn't detected ..... The placenta is now known as a tumour and all must be removed I'm told do no cysts left behind as they can then turn cancerous but this is very rare, I'm told this to ease my nerves but downer help as a molar pregnancy is 1 in a 1000 it really is just random if you get nothing to do with genes family history your health nothing just sheer bad luck .... So my surgery was yesterday and my baby is gone now all the plans gone all the dreams shattered and I'm no left with 6 months of check ups on my hormones as they will stay rocket high for months making me cruelly still feel pregnant. 

Sorry it's such a lengthy one I just had to tell some people xx