Experienced mama question....

I've always heard that you can't poop, pee, shower or bathe in peace again after kids. Is there anyone who will say this isn't true for them? I know it may be different once I have kids, but I've always said I won't allow that to happen. I'm not planning on letting them in there with me, and if they beat on the door there will be no response. Granted....I'm not stupid so before you get excited about jumping on my butt about safety, of course I'll make sure the child is either watched by the father or securely placed somewhere and I'll watch them via video cam. Opinions??