Sex & Relationships
From relationship goals to sex advice: if it's about sex or relationships, share it here.
I need advice story is super long & continues in comments
So about 7 months ago I decided to try an online dating site and started talking to this guy.. Immediately I took an interest in him. We had a lot in common, he made me laugh and overall he was different. During that time we were never anything serious so I was talking to multiple guys as well. One day he messaged me and asked if he could be honest with me, he told me that he wanted to know what my intentions were with him, he didn't care if I talked to other people because we were still getting to know each other but he was starting to really like me and was only talking to me.. He even suggested erasing our accounts and trying to see where things go with us.. So I stopped talking to the other guys I was talking to because that's when I realized this guy may really like me. Now I'm a very shy girl, before him I had only one serious relationship and he was my first EVERYTHING. So whenever he'd ask to take me out I'd flake or make up an excuse but that didn't stop him from trying. We'd text all day, talk on the phone all night, we had phone sex but he told me that the first night we meet he didn't want to have sex he just wanted to spend time with me physically. Then one night we were talking and I told him about how I had trust issues because a guy that I talked to briefly after my ex used me and left, come to find out that guy used to work with him and sometimes they'd hang out. I asked him if it would be a problem talking to me because they're friends and if he didn't want to talk to me because of that I'd understand. He told me he didn't care, he hadn't talked to that guy in almost half a year and wanted to continue what we were. Then next thing you know everything went downhill.. Idk what happened exactly till this day but we would always play fight, then one day I jokingly started an argument and he never texted me back. I tried texting him to see if he was mad at me still no reply... Then later on in the night he texted me saying that he had a really bad day at work and was gonna go clear his mind with some of the guys,. Me not wanting to invade his space told him to go ahead and call me when he was home safely he called me at 5am belligerently drunk and started talking to me in a way he never did before. He started telling me that I was his bitch, my pussy was his and when I told him to stop talking to me like that because it was disrespectful he told me to stop being dramatic. He even told me he loved me & when I didn't say anything back he hung up on me. The next morning I didn't get a good morning text nothing... I went to work checked my phone at lunch still nothing, so me worried because that was unusual decided to check up on him and text him. I said something along the lines of "Hey, I'm just checking in to see if you are okay. You were pretty messed up last night, I don't care what was said just please let me know if you're okay." he then replied apologizing for what he said then told me that he just needed space.. Anyways.. A week went by and it was Valentine's Day. Previously we had plans to do something so I took the weekend off. Me not wanting to be in the house sad, because at this point I obviously developed strong feelings for him decided I was gonna out out with my friend. We went to some Valentine's Day concert and we both got drunk.. I ended up snapchatting myself crying about how I missed him... When I finally got home and got to bed he ended up calling.. He apologized for hurting me and said it wasn't me at all, just a lot of things going on in his personal life and he just needed time to himself. He then promised we'd spend the following day together. The next day came no call, no text. I ended up texting him mad because he promised and we ended up getting into it. We didn't talk for a couple of days then he ended up texting me saying that he really likes me and he's sorry for hurting me but right now he's at a low point in his life and feels like he has to fix himself before he can be with someone. So I was heart broken. Two months went by and I got nothing. We went from talking everyday to NOTHING. Yet he would always be the first person to watch every single one of my snapchats on my story. We still had each other on social media, we just wouldn't contact each other. I would wake up every night checking my phone for a missed call or text nothing. I'd cry every night.. Eventually I was tired of it and started going out more.. My friends ended up setting me up with this guy and although he kept my mind of of him he wasn't him and he would still cross my mind everyday. One night I went out with my friends and we were snapchatting our night. When the night was over my friend & I sat outside of my house talking when out of the blue he messages me, talking about "Wow you turn up a lot now huh?" We started talking which led him to asking if I wanted to finish a couple beers with him. Me having some liquid courage agreed and he ended up picking me up. On our way to his house I realized I never gave him directions and asked how he got my address, he said he remembered one night while we were talking I was writing a letter and repeated it out loud. He even said sometimes he'd drive by.. I know that sounds creepy but I thought it was cute. Anyways, got to his house then next thing you know we're kissing.. Things got a little heavy and he stopped.. He told me we didn't have to do anything, he didn't invite me to have sex he just wanted to hang out.. Me being curious asked if he had sex with anyone while we weren't talking and he admitted that he did. I then asked if he was talking to someone else in which he said yeah. I honestly felt my heart break in that moment.. He then said he didn't wanna have sex incase things got serious with her. Like are you fucking kidding me? You needed "SPACE" yet you started talking to someone else already! Idk what got into me, but I ended up grabbing him and kissing him and we had sex for the first time. I don't know what I thought, maybe I thought if we had sex he'd want me again but the next morning when he dropped me off I told him "I wish you the best of luck with you and your new girl" and he rolled his eyes and drove away. When I got Into my house I remember throwing myself on my bed and crying my heart out. I've never done that before.. That wasn't me at all.