Baby shower drama?

Question

Okay please correct me if I am wrong. But isn't the point of a baby shower to celebrate the mother to be and her baby? If that being so should the mother to be have input on the ongoing of the shower? Here's a little insight behind my questions.
My mother, a few of her friends, my younger sister, and my cousin are co-planning a baby shower for me. No my mother has never known my likes and dislikes well as we are not close. My cousin sees me maybe once a year. My sister likes things her way no matter what and I've never met my mother's friends. I've tried putting in some input on what I would like/not like decoration wise. I don't just want boring blue. I like camo. No sports themes since I hate sports. Ect. Or little reminders of things I don't want/need for gifts. No scrapbook/baby book items since it will just get thrown away. Don't need newborn -6 month clothes. Ect. Well everytime 9 put input in or ask a question to my cousin I'm ignored! I ask my mother and she just said don't worry you will like what is planned. Like I don't enjoy surprises because I'm almost always disappointed which is why I want some input on the shower! I don't mean to sound spoiled b/ I'm not. This is the first thing my mother has ever done like this for me and is only able to afford it b/it's at our families cabin. Am I being greedy wanting some insight on what they have planned?

Answer

Besides picking things on your registry, I don't think any moms have a real input on what there shower will be like. It's other people showering you with gifts, love, and good time together. In 5 years you won't remember the decorations, even if you hate the way the cabin looks. It sounds like you're really blessed to have these people that you aren't close with, to go out their way to plan this 💗💙

Answer

Yeah kinda, I mean it's a celebration to shower your baby. If you aren't throwing it yourself, just try to relax and take the kind gesture. I mean, you sound like you are trying to control quite a bit. Try to just let it happen. 😍😍

Answer

I only put in input for my baby shower that my mom and grandma are throwing me because she asked me what I liked. I just said not all blue. Add green. But really I'll be happy with anything. I'm just looking forward to hanging out and eating some food. Lol.

Answer

Just relax and enjoy what they put together. You can return or exchange any gifts you get and don't need or want.

I think you should have some input but unless your helping to pay for it I would say they have the final call and I'm sure they are trying to do something you will like.

Answer

I have input. I am way too much of a control freak. my family knows me and even though they're helping out, they know to refer to me. I don't like surprises. I like things my way lol Nothing wrong with that. If they're throwing a party for you, you should like it. My opinion.

Answer

Someone else is hosting, planning, and paying for your shower - so no, you don't get much say, if any at all. If you were paying for it yourself it would be done your way, but your family is trying to do something nice for you. Let them! Be grateful, and stop trying to control everything. Does it REALLY matter if the decorations aren't exactly to your taste? The point of a baby shower is to celebrate your baby-to-be, not to nit pick the party planning decisions of the people who generously are throwing you a shower. A shower at which you will receive gifts you would otherwise be paying for yourself.

I understand you have preferences - so do I (I would prefer to not have my shower be a surprise, but my mom is generously hosting, planning, and paying, and she desperately wants it to be a surprise). But when someone is doing something nice for you, you don't make demands or specifications. You say thank you, and mean it.

I don't mean this to come across as harsh - honestly I don't! I just want you to see how lucky you are that you have not one but multiple people who care enough about you and your baby to throw you a shower at all. Coming from my middle-class background, I myself had never realized until I joined Glow that MANY moms-to-be plan and pay for their own showers, or don't have showers at all. You and I are the lucky ones!

Answer

I have no earthly idea what's going on for my baby shower, and frankly I like it that way. One less thing to stress about. They know me well enough and what they don't know they can ask my husband if I'd like it. Worse comes to worse, I will still appreciate whatever they do, even if it isn't my taste, because they spent their money and time to do something special for me and my baby. That's just my perspective on it.

Answer

I completely understand, I was worried about the or one of my shower but I decided to be grateful and thankful that they thought enough of me to plan one. Just get whatever they give you and be happy-some people don't have the support you do. I'm a really picky person so I'll say just gladly accept gifts with a smile and return whatever you don't need! I was really surprised that although nobody used our registry, we got a ton of stuff that we actually needed and I'll only be returning one item. Just be grateful :)

Answer

The only reason I'm so stressed out about it is because 1)my mother has never done something like this for me. She was very physically and verbally abusive to me as a child which is why I was never close with her. She just started now because of having a grandson on the way. She is a bit slower mentally though which is why I'm concerned and trying to give tips on things I like and don't like. And 2) a lot of my extended family has never liked my family. Mostly due to my mother, but still. So between The family drama and them not knowing me I wanted just a little say to at least get something out of it if the event goes south.... maybe I'm worrying to much but idk...

Answer

It's hard when you don't have control over something that is important to you.  It's nice they are throwing it but I can see how you feel.  My friend is throwing me one 9/17 and the invites haven't been sent out yet.  I'm an early bird so I'm getting anxious about it.  I asked her and she got offended.  Now I feel like she thinks I'm ungrateful.  It's a touchy thing.

Baby shower drama?

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