Do you believe that respect has to be earned?  Or do you think that it's something you're suppose to have for an adult? My mom says I don't respect her, because I don't say please or don't "use the right tone" when addressing her.  But I feel like that's just how I talk, which does have a bit  of attitude in it, I can admit that.  But the thing is I do respect her, but I just can't physically bring myself to say things like please and thank you. Mainly because I feel like she's the rudest person ever, a major hypocrite, and kinda lazy. She expects me to say please and thank you but demands stuff.  she'll say, gimme this, or gimme that.  And she'll tell me to look for socks for her then make me put them on.  Like maybe you're too tired from work to put your own socks on, but if you can't do that then maybe you're feet aren't all that cold.  She always tells me it's not good to be lazy but she sure doesn't practice what she preaches.