Like honestly, gosh this is long and no one is gonna read or reply lmao BUT 

I had to do work experience so j did it at my primary school and this guy came, he was someone I never met before + hot asf. So I'm usually pretty awkward, if he didn't start a conversation I wouldn't of and basically we were talking day 1 I started to think he was hot + nice he said all the right things and wasn't a fuck boy (from my knowledge) 

Day 2:

Break time we sitting in a class room together talking about stuff having so much fun constantly smiling and laughing I was like holy shit he is amazing and fast forward to home time as we said bye he pulled me in for a hug and HOLY DAMN and told my friend everything 

Day 3:

I talk freely about my boobs to anyone honestly every girl has them, we were sitting down and start talking about girls then boobs and I mentioned mine and everything I hate about them and he is like calling them arousing and saying shit like 'they look great to grab' and I took it as like funny talking cause we were laughing and shit and then we were kicking a soccer ball around and I was sitting on the floor he walked over to me and I punched his leg we started play fighting and next minute he's laying on top of me, he gets off me laying on the ground beside where I was sitting and he stared into my eyes right,  and I broke it and said 'are you ticklish and started tickiling home *he wasnt* then he tickled me and shit went on, and later that day we were waiting for his dad to pick him up and we were talking about crushes he is like 'honestly so many girls like me and I can tell' I was like ok cool... Then I was talking about the guy I used to like and he said 'who do you like now' and he fucking knew it was him and it was so hard because he was like pressuring me to say it, after we got that convo over and done with he is like 'yeah I was flirting with you today because I knew you liked me, I'm sorry if I led you on or anything' fucking boom, I'm like hurt over here and was like 'well Uma miss my bus bye' he gave me a hug and left bc his dad was also there

Thursday and Friday we talked but not like flirty or cute? And Friday was the last day I could of spent with him or talk because he doesn't reply to messages or snaps and basically gave him a final hug and walked off crying and now I can't stop thinking about it and it hurts, I feel I only liked the idea of him tho because as soon as I told him it went away it sounds weird but that happens with the last guy I told as well wtf is wrong with me but basically, I had this great time with a guy and now I'm lost, and like, I've never been so close with a guy and I loved it? Relationship or not because sometimes I like to flirt with guys without people assuming we are in a relationship it's fun, but now I have no guy to do it with (even though it was only a week) I just need someone to talk to and help and also I'm too scared to message him 

Sorry guys, I know no ones going to read this but if someone does I appreciate it a lot honestly, and if someone replays helping me holy I'll love you