Struggling with being Cleft Strong.... My first son was born with a unilateral cleft lip and partial cleft in the gum line. I knew from the beginning that a cleft was a possibility with him because his father had a bilateral cleft lip and pallet. So it was no surprise when at 26 weeks we were told that he would have a cleft. My son was born very sick due to errors the Dr. made. At just 3 mo he was scheduled to have his repair surgery. 10 days before surgery we had pre-op that amounted to be a waste of time because no labs were done. 2 days before surgery my son started showing signs of an illness and 1 day before surgery he nearly died as we rushed him to the ER. He had meningitis. Long story short he is two and a half years old now and happy and healthy.

So you may wonder with a happy ending why am I struggling with being cleft strong? Well... I am expecting my second child now. It's a boy! While I am extremely excited and happy that after a year of TTC we are finally going to have another baby I am also terrified. I am terrified that this baby will also have a cleft. I am terrified if he does have a cleft how severe it will be. I am terrified that he will be sick the first 4 months of his life. I am terrified of the possibility of sitting in a waiting room while he's in surgery wondering if he will wake up after the anesthesia is supposed to be worn off. The list is never ending.

These fears that I have make me feel absolutely unworthy to be a mother.

Are there any cleft mommies out there who struggle with being cleft strong?