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You need to go to counseling xxx
abortion please comment with kindness
Okay so this is a doozy
I have 2 kids
My fiancé got me pregnant for the fourth time (second pregnancy ended in miscarriage) and he pressured me to get an abortion, and I wanted the baby I already loved it but because he and his family didn't think our family was ready for another. I got an abortion. After I got an IUD I was ecstatic I hated him for making me abort a baby I already loved, and to make it up to myself for allowing it to happen, I enrolled in college and started a workout schedule.. then I went out for some drinks with my fiancé and we had fun, two weeks later we asked his mum to babysit and went out again.. I think I obviously drank to much and was hungover the next day. BUT! Here is where things get crazy for me I stayed hungover for a month I thought I had alcohol poisoning so did my other half (it was my second time getting drunk ever), neither of us knew how I was with alcohol in my system. Anyway suddenly I wanted peaches and raspberries which I knew wasn't right (my pregnancy go to) so I took a test.. I was pregnant, went to the doctor and it turned out I got pregnant while I had the IUD in. Of course I'm fertile when I don't want to be.. my fiancé said he wanted me to keep it and I just kept thinking
"How dare he, try to make me keep a baby I never wanted or planned or hoped for?"
"I'm still mourning the child I actually hoped for and loved"
"I hate him!, for making me do this to him."
"I'm enrolled in college and the fetus would be due in April and my course ends in June, I'm going to fail if I have a baby 3 months before I finals"
I got an abortion for the second time and I didn't tell him until just before I went in, I was nervous of what his reaction might be. But I knew I did not want a baby that would hurt me more than an abortion would, I didn't even cry( the first abortion I was a wreck) I felt stress free and finally rid of the world I had on my shoulders.
But here is my wonder
It's been a month since my second abortion and suddenly I yearn to hold babies I seen on tv we all know how it starts, I have baby fever.. wth is wrong with me?
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COMMENT (92)
I would suggest you see a councellor or therapist. Not being judgmental here either, but i think you have a lot of issues you need to resolve, both for yourself and as a couple as well. Him making you abort the first baby has had a massive effect on you and your relationship with him, your both better off sorting your feelings out before you consider another baby.Wish you all the best.
Ch
Thank you for your understanding and it really did have a traumatic effect on me, I honestly don't think I was in a good place and the fact that I wanted the first baby made me feel obligated to myself and the second baby to keep it. I just knew I couldn't handle it
Je
this!
👩
Well stated.
How can someone "make you get an abortion?" I'm pro choice but it seems like you're now getting an abortion again to spite him? Either way do what you feel is best for you but please use condoms because I'd imagine it isn't easy to keep terminating back to back .
Po
That's what I was wondering, too. "Make"? And then she gets another abortion and doesn't tell him. It was his baby, too.
I'm sorry but this is just insane to me. 😳So your FIANCÉ, the man that should love you and support you through everything, MAKES you get an abortion for a child you already have a connection to and love??? Then you turn around and get pregnant again and since he WANTS to keep this baby you go and abort this one?? 🤔I don't mean to be harsh but that's some bullshit. I'm sure your having a hard time from the first abortion. But someone that's been pregnant 3 times already, that obviously does not want to get pregnant again, should be extra cautious. I mean what's done is done now so I just hope for your sanity you seek help. Hope everything works out for you and your family!
So what are you going to do? Get pregnant again and have a third abortion??? No one can force you to have an abortion, you have to sign the papers yourself.
La
Totally! And I know people always say it but it makes me angry when there are ladies that try for years and can't conceive and there are people using abortion as contraception, where I live in Northern Ireland abortion is illegal, I don't know if it is more accessible and "normal" where she is from
Ba
She asked what the hell was wrong with her, and people are giving her their opinion. Laura pointed out she already had the others aborted there's no reason to have another one if you're able to revengfully end a child's life. This was more supportive than anything else I don't know who wrote the post, but please don't try to have another she seems like the type of mother who can't have a connection with her children my sister has the same disorder and my parents have taken care of both her children because she chooses guys over them just like this lady did they aren't able to bond like most mom's are able to.
La
Thanks girls!! Im glad I'm not the only one that doesn't live in the dreamworld of fairies and rainbows haha. I could have said worse! And I don't see how she could have expected 100% positive feedback on a post talking about having two abortions
I just want to let you know that at least in my state, pregnancy and childbirth are included in disability and serious illness protections for students. Meaning, as long as your doctor can provide a note to the school saying you had to be out due to your pregnancy or childbirth, they are legally obligated to maintain your current standing in the class. If necessary, they are obligated to give you an incomplete and let you finish the work when you're ready, instead of taking the class again. I'm just mentioning this because it sounds like you might end up considering getting pregnant again, so you should look into this for your state because it is good information to have. I'm due in November and my classes don't end until mid December. I thought originally I'd only be able to miss a week of school but it turns out I can pretty much take as long as I want.
Ch
Thank you for the information, I wish I had this information when I learned I was pregnant if I had known I might not have been easily swayed
Gi
new york
La
What state are you in?
Look, honestly anyone who has anything negative to say doesn't realize how hard an abortion is mentally. You are strong and I commend you for making the best choice for you. You are probably suffering from depression related to mental trauma in a short time period- no one can process that much. And maybe you feel like you're alone because the fiesta abortion you did not want and the second one you feel like you let your partner down. What's important is to remember that you're never alone. You can always TTC again and have the child you've wanted when you're ready. Stay strong. I'm here if you need to talk. But depression and yearning for a child are totally normal after what you've gone through.
Ch
You're welcome, as long as it helped even the slightest bit I'm glad I got to show you some support❤️
Ch
I honestly just want to say thank you. Thank you for being so emotionally supportive of a complete stranger you have no idea how much support that little comment was to me 💕
Po
Just because their opinions don't jive with yours doesn't mean they've never had an abortion or been in a similar situation.
So you get pregnant w a baby you love instead of protecting it you abort bc of other ppls opinions. Then you get preggo again and abort bc your so wants that one but you dont love it and it might interfere w your course wk but now you want another baby even though it would still interfere w your course wk which is why you killed baby number 2 ? You need counseling and to get your hormone levels checked.
Kr
the post is talking about the two most recent pregnancies the abortions so thats what i responded to.
Ch
1st I had my daughter,miscarried, had my son 5 yrs later, then had two abortions
Kr
no it says she aborted for a second time she had no miscarriage
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