please tell me I'm not s bad mum 😢

So I've not been working for a year and have moved I feel so isolated trying for baby number 2 for a year and think I'm really struggling in the last few months I literally feel down all the time like I'm pretty worthless tonight I sed to my son who is 5 that I don't want to be his mummy 😳 I just got so mad and to be honest he wasn't doing anything a normally 5 yr old does pushing buttons but I just snapped I felt so bad I was sobbing and after 5 minutes went and gave him a cuddle and told him how I didn't mean to say it and explained mummy just got very angry 😔 but I feel like the worst mum ever and feel like I don't deserve another child