Yesterday would have been my due date from my miscarriage in Feb. I just feel sad this weekend. I have these videos when we revealed to our families we were prego and I don't want to delete them but don't want to watch them either.

I've had a second miscarriage since. Life is just feeling cruel and sad. I got laid off last week and had foot surgery 5 days ago. I feel like my family doesn't remember that yesterday would have been my due date bc no one has said anything.

I just feel sad and alone and like we're never going to have a successful pregnancy. We've been trying since April 2015. Now bc of my surgery and another one in February, TTC is being put on hold. Maybe it's a good thing to take a break.

What's weird is I feel the loss of my 1st miscarriage more deeply than I do my 2nd one. I think bc my 1st happened at 8 weeks and I had all the symptoms, like I felt very prego. My 2nd miscarriage was at 4 weeks and I didn't have strong symptoms of being prego.

Idk....just in a weird funk. Just sad...I could've had a baby today 😢😭