Scared to kiss

Im really scared , to kiss someone, because My first kiss was with a guy who was a year older then me and the first time he tried to kiss me and i told him i wasnt comfortable with kissing that early in our relationship (just starting to date maybe a week into it) and he said he respects that, and i thought things were going good but then after a party he pinned me against a wall and he was making out with me and putting his hands all over me while his bestfriend watched and i tried to stop it but he is really strong and bigger then me And his hands held my face still and like i said before he had me pinned against the wall , he was really rough and forceful and im scared to kiss or to even get kissed by anyone , i broke up with him the next day ,, anytime a guy even tries to come close fir a kiss i get scared and flake out , even if i really like the person , any advice?