no father in his life or a "no-good" father in his life?

emmy leigh

What's best better for the child in the long short run - to have no father in his life or to have a "no-good" father in his life?

since I told my son's father I was pregnant he wanted me to get an abortion or else he has nothing to say to me. It hurt because it's like I didn't make this baby on my own I shouldn't have to raise the baby on my own. And he had no reason at all to not want to be involved. Long story short. I'm about to be 7months pregnant and he still hasn't been to not ONE doctors appointment. I'm emotionally tired. He doesn't text or call me to see how me and his son is doing and it pisses me off. I asked him is he even cares about his son and he said " he's not even here yet, like what's good with you"? Why does he have to be here for you to care? Like I don't understand. It pisses me off when he doesn't make an effort. I'm tired of crying about this but every day that goes by I'm getting closer and closer to meeting my son and I just want to protect him even.if it means protecting him from his father. Everyone is saying how he'll change when the baby gets here but I don't believe it. He has done nothing my whole pregnancy and now he's saying he's not gonna be at the baby shower because he's going to Cali. I know baby showers might not be a big deal for guys to be there but it is to me because this is my first baby and I just want him to be involved with everything. But if he doesn't care why should I ? I'm just thinking about my son when he does shit.. I want my son to know who his father is, I want his father to be apart of his life. But if he's inconsistent now nothing is going to change when he gets here. Little does he know I can be the worst baby mother and keep our son from him but I don't want to do that. But its like at the same time why do I have to beg you to be in your son's life you should just automatically want to do it. It's like he doesn't even care that he's about to be a father. He doesn't want his friends knowing or nothing. I'm at a point where if he doesn't show up to the hospital he can kiss all his rights good bye. I just don't know about this guy anymore. I guess it's true when they say " you don't know these guys until they become your baby father". So what do I do allow him to be inconsistent in his sons life. Or just keep him away period ?