pregnant or wishful thinking?

Baby bump, or wishful thinking?😭 Help please I've been ttc for almost 2yrs now. Also please post ur earliest preg pics if you can? My S/O refuses to get a HPT bc he knows how sad negatives make me.. Someone comfort me.:/ 
It got to the point already where I feel self conscious to even bring it up to him because I feel ashamed of my self that I haven't gotten pregnant yet.. He's super supportive but I still feel and empty spot in my heart. I feel so so sad frequently especially when I think about and question to why I haven't gotten pregnant yet. Can someone be my guardian angel and give me some type of hope or security or positive vibes? :( I'm not asking to be lied to but just for the honest truth in the most gentle of way...