for the very young women TTC
Hi ladies, I'm sure those of you who are young and TTC are sick of hearing people telling you not to. I'm sure it's a decesion that you've placed a lot of thought into and I know sometimes when you're determined to do something nothing can stop you. But I wanted to share my story with you because I got pregnant as a teen and I always get comments from other young women that their jealous of my life or they're TTC with their boyfriend and they're so excited. Of course I love my baby but I got pregnant by accident (while on bc) and I think it's important for women actively TTC to know the other side. Not the adorable pictures us young moms post on Instagram, or the Facebook statues of us doing fun things with our little families but the raw truth of what it's like to be responsible for a little human while you are still young yourself.
1) Most boys hate the idea of being tied down at a young age and a child is the ultimate form of this. If your boyfriend does not know you are TTC please be aware that he will probably react in anger/sadness and he will leave you. If he is on board with TTC also be prepared that he may leave you when it becomes real. Even women who are married get left or cheated on sometimes during or after a pregnancy. Would you still want this baby if you were a single mother? I don't care how much you think he will stick around, please consider this question. Even if he is supportive there is no guarantee of the future.
2) Pregnany is a very vulnerable time. Many women struggle with the fact that their body is changing. I can't speak for everyone but once I got out of the second trimester I felt gross. You will not be able to shave easily if at all, you will likely get stretch marks that will never go away, your nipples will get huge and dark, your feet may sweep, you may get cellulite you never had before or gain weight in other areas of your body. It is not fun watching your hot young body transform and knowing you may never get it back. For some women this is more distressing than others.
3) You may think that your financial situation will work itself out. First of all, you're not going to feel like working once you get into the later stages of pregnancy, you will be tired and irratible. Besides that, let's be honest how many of us young girls have a really stable income? Penny pinching to pay for a baby is really not fun. I wish I would have been able to really enjoy buying things for my baby. To have a house and decorate the nursery however I wanted, to buy cute little outfits without having to budget. To go on a babymoon, to take more date nights before baby, to get massages, to get that cute diaper bag I love etc. Money isn't everything but it's much easier to enjoy a pregnancy and baby when your in a situation where you can splurge and treat yourself every once in a while
4) Your friends may be supportive but they will probably drift a little and you may feel extremely isolated and alone. You won't have time to hangout and do the things they're doing once the baby is here and even though they'll come visit and be excited that will die down. For me, during pregnancy was even worse. It's not fun to be the big pregnant one waddling around in oversized clothes while all your hot young friends talk about boys and booze. Quite frankly it made me feel more insecure.
I know this was really long and it's just my experience but I wanted to share it with you. There's a ton more I could say but I'll leave it at this for now. Accidents happen and despite all the above young moms still love their babies to death. But no one will tell you that it's easier. Really truly consider your options because most of the time it's better to wait. That's all 😊
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