Friend's Insensitive Pregnancy Announcement
I had a miscarriage last week (1st pregnancy) at 10w (baby stopped developing around 6 wks). Obviously I'm crushed and hurt, and now I feel like I'm in limbo until next month when we can try again.
I spoke with my friend "Anna" two days ago. The last time I talked to her was several weeks ago. During that conversation she asked me when I thought my husband and I would have kids. I told her that we had started trying, & that I was waiting to see if I was pregnant (turns out I was).
So yesterday when Anna contacted me, I immediately opened up to her about all the painful details of my miscarriage. She said some supportive things (& some questionable- like "at least you know ur body can make a baby"- wtf). Then she proceeds to text me "I have some news for you too though. But I feel bad telling you now. I'm pregnant"
At first I thought she was gonna announce that she set a wedding date (she's engaged). Turns out she's 22 weeks along. That means that the last time we spoke, she was already 12-13 wks along!!! So Idk why she thought the best time to tell me (@22wks) was right after I told her about my miscarriage 😒. The worse part is, when Anna text me the other day, she said she'd text me later that night so we could plan to meet up the following day (she claimed she wants to be there for me). I haven't heard from her since.
Anna blowing me off yesterday caused me to have a meltdown. I already feel helpless that I had a miscarriage- but now I feel helpless that a friend is treating me like shit when I'm already down.
My husband said she's probably too self-involved to realize that she's being insensitive- or maybe she's embarrassed that she told me. My sister said she's a coward, & I should wait until when (or if) she contacts me again, and then I can tell her that she hurt me.
I guess I'll take my sister's advice. I want to be happy for Anna- but the way she broke the news and blew me off is making it really hard (for the record, the only reason I hadn't physically seen her lately is b/c my husband and I had been outta town for months).
If you read this, thanks for listening. This friend interaction really messed with my grieving process, and I just had to vent. Much love & baby dust to you all 💞.
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