A little different

My grandmother died just about a week ago and I am having a hard time accepting the fact that she won't see me get married or have kids. I want a baby more than anything. I want my life to get started. I'm only halfway through nursing school and I know right now is probably not the right time but I cannot get my mind off of it. I want a baby and I wanted to wait but now so much has changed.. I just need other point of views.