"If you love someone let them go, if they come back they will always be yours and if not you're better off..."

This is a spin off of the original quote, but this one is the one my mom has always told me. Today has been one of my lowest days because I just told the guy I have loved for two years, that ultimately I want him to be happy so I am stepping out of his life..

Let me precursor this with the fact of we never dated. Of course we went on a few dates to get food and such but never "you are mine and I am yours" Kind of dating.

His name is Brett* and we started working for the same company at exactly the same time in 2014 just before I turned 19, and when I say he was a God send, he was...I have never met a man so comfortable with taking a stand for someone he didn't even know. Needless to say, I was impressed for a 26 year old to put his job on the line for a girl he just thought had a nice smile and a kind heart. In the following days I found that he had been watching how I acted with customers and other employees.

It wasn't love at first sight by any means. I mean he was nice but I wasn't interested.. but slowly and surely he grew on me...

Fast forward a year filled with different relationships on each side, and me becoming a love sick pathetic puppy who craved his attention like I craved air to breathe...I had told him how I felt in a fit of stupidity, and made the situation uncomfortable for him; But that didn't stop me from coming back every single time he asked me too...Then enters Dot*...she's tall and skinny and nothing but a right bitch who plays the men in her life...she caught his eye and I flew out the window...She told him that I was detrimental to his life and their relationship...so he stopped calling, texting and even wanting me around, which is really hard because we ALL worked together...I watched as my best friend, and the guy I was in love with, fell in love with her, while she had 4 other guys on the side...then suddenly one day I got a text saying that he was so sorry he let her dictate how he was going to treat me and that I had been right about her the whole time..two days later she was engaged to another guy...

Then they broke up...and got engaged again..then broke up again...and got engaged AGAIN..this back and forth went on for 8 months and she just bounced between Brett and the "engagement dude" ultimately breaking Brett to the point of total hatred of himself for letting her do this...so he told her to go away.

Now let's just fast forward to tonight. I'm about to turn 21, he will be 28 shortly after that, and as you know, I love him more than anything else, with my whole heart...but he doesn't want me and ultimately I am making his life harder by having the feelings that I have for him. I want him to be happy, and I'm keeping him from his happiness by staying around and fighting so hard for his love...so tonight at 23:44, I stopped fight for his love and started thinking about my love for him and what I want most for him; Happiness

"Hey, listen..

It's not really a big deal if you want me to go away and leave you alone. I understand, and I don't want you keeping me around if you really don't want me around..you don't owe me anything lol..I really enjoy our time together and you know how I feel about you and everything, but I don't want to make you uncomfortable anymore. So just tell me what you want and I'll do it..even if that means never talking to or seeing you or Nena again..I get it..I just want you to be happy because I love you; And love means doing whatever is necessary in order for the person you love to be happy, even if it means giving them up..

I'm sorry.."

I haven't stopped crying since then and my heart is broken...the things you do for the people you love might kill you but ultimately if you love them, you would still do it even if it hurts you...I know this isn't a post asking for advice, but I had to tell someone...

Threesome