I don't understand

Reanna
I don't understand...negative test today. A FRER even. Af due 12/10. Have so many symptoms...sore boobs, metallic taste, tingly nipples, gas, diarrhea/constipation, heartburn, cramps, bloating, itchy skin, acne, headaches, bubbly tummy. Know what my pms symptoms are????? Nothing!!! I never had cramps in my 17 years of menstruating. No joke. Never. (Which now I could see why women hate them-although mine are super mild). I've had these symptoms since 3DPO. I have one beautiful daughter that took fours years. And a son I conceived kind of quick who I miscarried. Why does it take months and months and yearrrrrs. Seriously. I just want to crawl in a hole and die. Especially thinking I would get a bfp this month with my lost ones due date (first time it's come up) is Wednesday 12/7.