I think I'm out . no christmas blessing for me

Im supposed to start af today or tomorrow . I tested today and got a BFN . When I was peeing in the cup very little brown discharge came out which meant to me AF is arriving 😩 I was so hopeful this month !! I had crazy signs indicating this would be the month . But I guess not . Seems like AF is already knocking on the door .  Or should I still hold hope ? I usually get spotting before Af this was very little brown mucus . Idk 😞 but the test was a BFN . 😭😭😭