should I take him back?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and one month. We broke up once or twice for less than a week each time just because of arguing, but we always fixed stuff and got back together. We broke up again in October and kept talking for about 3 weeks and got back together the beginning of November. Things were going good until about 3 weeks ago. We broke up again and we were almost to the point of us being okay again when I find out he had sex with a girl back in October and he might have had sex with his ex the past weekend. Both times he had sex with these girls we were broken up but still talking. He hid the first one from me until I confronted him about it and he finally gave in and said it was true but he was being stupid. The girl is said to have The Clap (an STD) and I'm worried he has it now. He swears up and down that he doesn't have it and I told him the only way we are going to fix things is if he gets tested for STD's. He resides and says he's fine and he knows he doesn't have it. But he says he loves me and wants to fix things. What do I do? I love him and I want to fix things too. He made a mistake and everyone does. I just need some opinions from other people because I'm so confused on what is the right thing to do. Thanks!

Answer

You're strong considering you're even thinking about taking him back. Not that he cheated but once you guys start sharing such an intimate experience with others a lot would change. I could never even think about my boyfriend with anyone else like that I'd lose my shit. Anyways, he should get tested. For your sake.

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Do not have sex with him. He definitely needs to be checked before anything happens in the bedroom

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I agree make him get tested and if he really loved you. He wouldn't of slept with anyone period whether you guys were broken up or not! You didn't hook up with anyone so why would he? Be smart girl! You are too beautiful and you will definitely find another! He's not worthy of you. If he was, he wouldn't have done that nor put you at risk. ❤️

Answer

Here's my opinion. Although you two were broken up both times he hooked up with those girls, he was talking to you. Head basically lead you on. In all honesty though, of y'all are constantly breaking up due to arguments, it's going to continue to happen. If it were me, I wouldn't be able to handle the fact that my boyfriend had slept with two other girls in such a short time. IF you are considering the fact of getting back together Id make him get tested before you do and go with him if he does. But if it were me, I'd just have to move on no matter how much I loved him. There's someone better out there. Good luck❤️

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There was nothing wrong about hooking up with other women when you two were broken up, but he should have been honest upfront about it when you got back together and told you he slept with someone new. If you think you can work it out, then try working it out again, but if you guys keep breaking up there is usually a good reason for it. If you've had sex with him recently I would recommend you also get tested, especially since he seemed hesitant about getting tested himself.

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You guys werent together so it's fine..its not good that he did but some people do stupid things when they are heartbroken and rebound fast.

Get him tested and stuff tho

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Well it sounds like you already know what you want since you stated he needs to get tested before you guys are fine so keep to your values around this. Also only you know what's best for you no matter what others tell you to do focus on your gut feeling

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Here is my honest opinion on this . First of all , the whole doing things with other women . You guys weren't together so that's something either you can look past or can't ... in my experience when me and my ex broke up he made out with another women and I forgave him and we ended up back together . But here is the honest truth . If you guys break up that many times due to arguing/ the same stuff over and over again ... it's not gonna change and you most likely aren't compatible . My rule is I give someone a second chance and if the mess up again , then it's done for good .