I wanted a baby with the love of my life And a family is not what he wants right now. We're young and in our early 20s and he did just have a baby and the kid not even one yet. I was plotting and tryna line up sex with my fertile window hoping that I would conceive but sometimes he would pull out and it wouldn't happen. So after plotting for a year i gave up and just asked him so i can let this headache go. I wanted a baby with him so bad but it wasn't gonna be an ideal situation. And now i feel like im spiraling because I don't got nothing going on to excite me. Like I'm just existing in life. I got no purpose and as badly as I wanted to see him and have sex with him today because I know I ovulated today I fought against it and didn't go over there. Plus sometimes I feel like I'm too clingy and it's been giving me anxiety. I don't know what to do with myself and how to deal with not having the one thing I wanted.