So I know this is a huge no no, but I really cared for the guy. We were together for a year and a half and we were best friends. We recently broke up before Christmas because we got into a huge fight and just felt like we couldn't be honest with each other. Later that night I went on his snapchat and found messages to other girls only 20 minutes after our split! (He did cheat on me last summer by having sex with his ex 3 times but I forgave him and we were happy again) I was upset and kinda went off and then when we talked about it I wanted to get back together but he was unsure. We work together two days a week now and I didn't wanna loose our friendship. Against what my friends said, I slept with him last week after we got in the moment at his place. I know he's probably talking to other girls and I casually text other guys sometimes but nothing really. He's always secretive about his phone now when we are together and last night I spent the night for the first time ever (he lives with his parents and they were out of town). The sex was good but I constantly feel like it's all about him. When we talk we discuss his college stuff and his sports but nothing really about me. And during sex last night I gave him head and he just used his hand for me which was good but still. He always asks me to scratch his back or massage him but will never do that for me, and this morning I asked him to go down on me since I did it to him last night and he kept saying "next time" which really bothered me. Idk. I still love him, but know a relationship isn't good for either of us. But I just feel kinda dirty and like a back up. Should I talk to him and tell him how I feel or just run? I also almost always text first and it was my idea for us to spend the night together.